Office Sugar Pushers 5/2/08

Some of my blog readers may be aware of the fact I used to be employed at the Michigan Public Service Commission for many years. Basically, my job duties at the MPSC were the same in nature in comparison the job duties I perform at the current time for Wisconsin Public Radio/Television (essentially, I fix your computer if it doesn't work). In both positions, I had/have free reign about the building. This has allowed/allows me to sharpen my networking prowess; and to feed my sugar addiction.

If you work in an office, you are aware of those who maintain a dish of sugar on their desk. For quite some time I have been one of them. However, while working at the MPSC I did not; I was a college student with limited funds. For seven years, I was habitual about making my rounds through the labyrinth of cubes at the Public Service Commission in search of my fix. Rarely, I replenished the supply of my pushers… Therefore, I now keep a 'sugar dish' on my desk to bring balance back to the force.

This brings me to the real meat and potatoes of my colloquium on the office 'sugar dish'. You and I both know that there certain rules and observances that apply if you decide to exploit one's candy on a regular basis. The following are mine…

*When stopping for your fix, remember your obligation to chat with the person for a couple of minutes. It's a turn off if you don't; no one wants to feel used for their commodities unless you're a stripper or prostitute.
*Don't become a systematic abuser. This can be interpreted as standing at the 'sugar dish' and consuming more than your share. One or two pieces of candy are considered the norm. Any more than this number will automatically deem you a glutton.
*Unless your status is above that of simply 'co-worker', it's bad form to commandeer sugar if the person is not at their desk.
*Show your gratitude. Every so often drop the George Castanza penny-pinch attitude and spend the $3 on a bag of candy. Or, if you so choose, you can do other certain small favors for your pusher. For example; I had one person gift me a plethora of headbands – a staple accessory in my wardrobe.
*Finally, refrain from looks of disgust or disappointment. If the dish is empty, well then maybe YOU should fill it. If you don't like what's being offered, then get the hell out of my office. I have work to do.